Stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stupid management....

Doing things without following rules and regulations??.....
Then why you set up the rules??

All the seniors is not "da sai"...
Damn stupid management!!!!!!!!!!!

R.E.S.T.R.I.C.T.I.O.N

Really wish i can take away all the restriction....

So nice to be quoting and get response and get heard...and get to close deal...

But so many restriction...

Lack of facilities...lack of access...how do you expect me to get confirmed earlier??

I wanted to show that i'm good and can do well as well....

But, restriction....

Only got one line that is active but they squarish so fast and i cant try my luck on others....

Can i change department???

Deaf!!!!!!!!!!

Stupid...deaf ah you!!!!!!!!

I quote and quote and quote....but you were asking me as if i never quote before.
Your fault for not paying attention...but make it sounds as if i never do my job...

What a leader??...I dun respect you at all!!
Asking me to do cheap cheap things for the clients...making fun and jokes in front of clients by telling about my things...I'm not here to be used by you...I won't do such cheap things...Worst come to worst, i can get job else where easily...These is not a leader's character...A leader is suppose to take care of the subordinates and defend of their subor as if we are your child...But, you???

Sorry...i wont respect you...You are not worth it!!!!!!!

Restriction...

I think i'm doing better. I'm able to get prices when i quote over the board sometimes and sometimes able to close deal. The feeling is good when you get to close deal...

But, i'm able to do that only if certain people didn't come for work or when i need to sit at somebody else's places...

The bad side of working with "horse" colleagues is when you need them to do something for you. I need to change place so that i can quote more lines using the digital box. But, the PC problem ady 2/3 days also still not settle, so can't change place yet.

No Reuters messenger yet. Communication problem. Ask me to quote the line but they also come in. Causing me dunno shld continue or not....

One dealer ask me to greet him every morning but each time when he response me, my senior go in the line and i not quick enough to talk wth the dealer. End up, the dealer might misunderstand me for not greeting him...Sometimes, really wish that my that particular seniors is not around..

Bcos of other's people attitude, affects me...I get the restriction of performing better...i can do better. I'm sure of that, because i get response for what i did. And it satisfied me..Especially when they give you prices, close deal for you and even want to know your name. Felt being heard. Is happy and felt been recognised. You dun feel like you are jus talking to a silent box. Someone opposite there is listening and giving attention...

I can do better and will...jus need a bit of assistance...i gonna remove all the restriction...Jia you!!!!!!!

Lost....

Feeling myself doing terribly at work..
I want to do better...
Learn more and just better..
But, i'm lost ...
No sense of direction and dunno wat i suppose to do...

God, help me...

Love and Like....

当你站在你爱的人面前,你的心跳会加速；
当你与你爱的人四目交投,你会害羞；
但当你站在你喜欢的人面前,你只感到开心；
但当你与你喜欢的人四目交投,你只会微笑.

当你与你爱的人对话,你觉得难以启齿；
当你爱的人哭,你会陪她一起哭；
但当你和你喜欢的人对话,你可以畅所欲言；
但当你喜欢的人哭,你会技巧的安慰她.

当你不想再爱一个人,你要闭上眼睛并忍着泪水；
当你不想再喜欢一个人,你只要掩住双耳!

喜欢，是一种心情
爱，是一种感情

喜欢，是一种直觉
爱，是一种感觉

喜欢，可以停止
爱，没有休止

喜欢一个人，特别自然
爱一个人，特别坦然

喜欢一个人，有时候盼和他在一起
爱一个人，有时候怕和他在一起

喜欢一个人，不停的和他争执
爱一个人，不停的为他付出

喜欢一个人，希望他可以随时找到自己
爱一个人，希望可以随时找到他

喜欢一个人，总是为他而笑
爱一个人，总是为他而哭

喜欢，是执着
爱，是值得

喜欢就是喜欢，很简单
爱就是爱，很复杂

喜欢你，却不一定爱你
爱你，就一定很喜欢你

其实，喜欢和爱仅一步之遥
但，想要迈这一步
就看你
是喜欢迈这一步
还是爱迈这一步！

Can Ugly Duckling Really become Swan??

Felt myself really like an ugly duckling...
Not good in presenting myself
Not good in appearance...
Not good in talking with people
Not good at socializing...
Really lost confidence at myself
Can i do better??
can an ugly duckling really become a swan??

Do i ever get to be a swan?
I want to looks better and feel better...

I'm Sucks........

Two weeks went over in Harlows MGI...
Moved to Seapark...very near LRT Tmn Paramount...walking distance....
Good chat wth housemate...evrythg seems fine...

Working???
Damn hard...not in terms of work load...but in terms of work expectation....I'm sucks...really bad..
No one said to me that i'm sucks...but, i can feel myself is bad...not performing well...terrible...
Keep on having comments from the seniors and colleagues...Bad and negative comments...
But, i had tried to improve...still receiving comments...not lesser....but everyday surely will receive some comments...making me feel that i'm terribly bad and not good at all...

I never felt like this before in any of my previous job. All those previous job, i may be receiving comments but only once or twice, and i will make sure myself won't get the repeated comments again..But this job, i'm totally lost. Dunno what shall i do that is right and dunno what i shld hv do on some of the times...I keep having hesitation...Blur and hesitated and lost direction...

No confident of doing well and might have the fear of getting fired...I never get fired...and will not let this happen...Really scary...Why??Why i cant do better???

End of November...self evaluation!!!!!!!!!

Gambateh YS!!!!!!!

After the 1st week...

Harlow's MGI....
Nice, friendly, loud and very very brave colleagues...

Been placed in the money market side...
Colleagues willing to teach me...learn abit about the terms and jargons that they normally use in quoting the price...
Went out for lunch once with bank dealers...
A bit bored cos the topic is not so much between me and the dealers...
Feel myself very very lack of knowledge...
Must read more newspaper and update more on current issues...
So, newspaper is oso one investment ady...

Still have trouble finding room....
Dunno whether will get to move or not??
If not, will have to travel everyday from Subang Jaya to KLCC...
Wake up at 530am and reach there around 830am...
5min late means will miss the bus and the LRT...so reach KLCC will late a lot ady...
Dunno how long i can tahan like tat???
Haih...

These new job really make me change a lot...
Have to makeup, so i learn makeup and dress up and of course act prettier and more confident...
Speak louder and jokes more, talk nonsense too..
Will i get used??
Or can i even get over the probation period??

Went to listen about insurance and decided to involve partimely in insurance...
Now in my mind is only money and money....nothing else...bcos others i no need to think so much...
No more silly thinking...
Most important of all, now no more pesimistic thinking in my mind...
If meet up any problem, will try to ask around for opinion, brainstorming for solutions and definitely, there will be a solution...
No more nagging around, or complaining about this and that....
I can do it...
Yes, i will find solution and will be more positive of myself...


Gambateh,YS!!!
Jia you!!Jia you!!!

Goodbye Maersk...

Today is 11th October...
Tomorrow is my last day in Maersk...
And also my manager Carsten last day in Maersk Malaysia...
He will be going to Maersk China...
But i will be leaving Maersk...

Kath bring me to a seafood restaurant in Subang Airport there for farewell dinner...
So fast, i'll be leaving and she knows that from the 1st day i join...
Yet, it is just 3 months...
And i give her troubles...
No one take over my place yet...
Meaning she need to handle a lot of things by herself for a while and with Raya holidays around, Nita is taking leave...
Admin is only left Kath alone...
Yet she is so supportive and care about my new job, what will i be doing, whether i have found a new place, how will i be travelling to work before i move to a more convenient place,etc...
I really felt like i owe her...
But i never cried...
And never can express it out in front of her that i'm sad and i really like her and felt so heavy-hearted...not of leaving Maersk but because of leaving a nice boss behind...

Next week after Raya, will start the new job...
Ady found out the bus schedule and route, knows which bus to take to Kelana Jaya LRT station and take LRT to work...
Just hope that i won't be late and manage on time with all the time management.
Havent found a room to move in yet...
And dunno whether i will find any??
A bit blur and a bit uncertain...
But tired of looking for rooms ady...
Lazy to think ady...

Sanchoon wanted to rent a house in Tmn Mayang near Kelana Jaya LRT...one whole house and ask me to rent thr...
We can share, but for me is a bit inconvenient bcos it will be an empty house, unfurnished and without facilities, that will be too expensive...
But, staying together with fren, indeed is safer and more convenient, and if need any help will definitely be easy...
I also know that he is a very nice fren...
However, i'm really not sure and hate to think about that also...
Is like suddenly, everythg is not going smooth and i need to find solution and make decision about a lot of things...
My smooth period and short term goodluck for the time when i just move in to this Subang house seems not so strong anymore...
Or maybe there is something better in front there that need me to get only if i manage to cross over the trouble that i'm having now...
That is what i always advice myself at...
"Something better is waiting ahead of you, just stay on and after you cross over this hardship, you will felt much much better and the rewards is waiting in front"

I wish that you were somewhere closer with me and can share all these and share the opinion with me...wish that you were getting closer and nearby me...

Jiayou YS!!! _@_

1st October

Is the first day of October and is Monday...
In my office but today is damn free and i can't do anythg bcos the system that i need to access to do my work is down and there is nothing i can do but wait and wait...
So, all i can do is look at the high pilling of invoices i need to create PO but unable to do anything...
Surfing thru the net, reading people's blog and writing my own blog...

Weekends is fun...
Pei Ee came to KL and like usual...we will have MESAT gathering...
Spend whole Saturday shopping in Midvalley...i bought a lot..spend RM260...but is within my budget and i get all the things i need...
I need to make over my image...bought a few nice blouse and dress and makeup sets and few pairs of heels...
New job, new look and new image...
Feel excited about how is gonna be like ...my new job...wondering and imagining....

After that, we went to have steamboat in Kepong...very very long time havent had steamboat ady...
So full, so hot and so nice and so fun to be around these MESAT frens...
So familiar and yet so comfortable for me to say anything, eat in whatever manner...so comfy and can do whatever i like...there is no need for any special manner...just be as who you are...cos they will not look at me as if i'm an alien...
With new people, i need to build up a certain kind of shield...and pretend or just keep something with whatever i do...just to leave impression...
Not so nice,rite?

After that we go Bukit Permai...or "Small Genting"...somewhere up on a hill...there you can view the whole KL scenery...quite nice...and is a couple spot..
Can see lots lots of couples there...but i'm not goin in couple but with a bunch of frens...
Maybe nextime, someone else will bring me there??

Then next stop is a mamak stall in Wangsa Maju..BRJ...lots lots of people and is 2am in the morning...KL people never sleep itz??

After that, San Choon sent us back...on the way, we went to Chow Kit Street looking for "akua"...but not really saw anythg interesting....on the way back Puchong, saw accident...journey seems so long and that Saturday is fully used just like that...
Reach Puchong, Siew Ting's house around 4am...bath and chat with Siew Ting and Pei Ee...until around 6am only we sleep...

The next morning wake up around 9am..had breakfast in Puteri Mart and then sent Pei Ee to Pudu and then take some picture at Istana Negara...and half of the Sunday is spent...

Back to Subang house, wash clothes, had lunch and watch "200 Pounds Beauty"...and sleep damn early cos very tired and not enough sleep...8pm, i'm in my bed ady...

But...keep being wakeup by people calling me...HC call and sounds so fierce...as if he is forcing me to make decision on the spot to move to Wangsa Maju...i dun wan to make such a rush decision...and i dun like Wangsa Maju...still searching for a proper place and a place that is more comfy to live.Because, for me, a house is very important especially when after a day of hard and stress at work..you will definitely need a very calm, peace and comfy house to rest...
But, the way he talk to me is as if i need to just call and move in as long as there is an empty room...Sorry, i can't do that and i hate moving around...

The worst part of this new job that i will be going to is the uncertainty that i need to deal with...I'm uncertain of my capability, whether i can handle the job or not, i'm uncertain whether i will like there or not, i'm uncertain whether where i should stay, should i move? or just travel?...should it be in PJ, or Wangsa Maju or somewhere else?..the only excitement about this new job is the opportunity to meet people, the opportunity to learn new things, financial instruments and all kinds of new knowledge that is applicable and of course the rewards in term of $$ that it offers...

But after all, i'm still in doubt...whether is this the right decision??
Everything seems so fast, i feel as if i'm just here, just start new life in Subang/KL (3 mths ago,actually)...and now, i need to start anew again...haven't hardly get used, but i need to do some changes again...
Finding troubles by myself??
Or heading to a better life??
I really need someone by my side now, and give me advice and help me to lead my life...
God, you will arrange everything,rite??

Praying hard...:)

Please God, Guide Me...

These few days really felt myself lost and floating...
Unable to make decision and dunno who should i go to...
There is always some discouragement and some harsh words that make my faith tremble...

Aunt pass away..that is fast and unpredictable...

I resigned.HR accepted my resignation and confirmed that my last day will be on 12 October. Went to a one-day training on the new job, like attending a lecture. I like it bcos i totally need to learn a lot.But at the same time, i'm afraid.Can i handle the job?I have very very very little knowledge about it.After attending the training, i feel like i need to go to a public library and borrow lots of books and come back and read.Is just like back to the school-day, doing assignment time when u need to do some study and research from the very basic concept to understand the whole thing.That is interesting. But, i also scared from the way they talk, fast and speedy during quoting and speak lenghty words in short period,fast but clear.Can i do that?

At the same time, i need to find solutions to a lot a lot of questions.First, i need two hours to reach my new workplace from my current stayplace.Everyone is advicing me to move.I know that is true.But to where?Everyone suggest one place: Wangsa Maju. But at the same time, everyone is giving me the same discouragement, by telling me that the place is not a good place to stay, telling me is dirty, is crowded and is dangerous. So what is the suggestions?Is like you a giving me a suggestions and at the same time, u are giving objections to that suggestions.So, what should i do??

Next, i have a conversation with a fren. She is like suddenly giving me solution. When i thought that will be the best idea, everything will be settle, suddenly, turn out that suggestions receive same thing...a lot of objections. ST suggested me to buy a motor, ride to nearer LRT station, at least save a bit of the time spend on KTM and on walking. I was about to accept that idea. Then, everyone else is telling me not a wise decision.Is dangerous. What happens if it rain?What happens when you met snatch thief?What happens when you ride at nite?All sort of stories came out, making me worry and started to think of NO to the motor idea.
So what should i do?

Mum is totally disagree with my resignation. She scold at me.Said that i shouldn't have resigned now.Should have wait till December after get bonus pay. Said that i never think of new workplace, whether was it convenient or not?Said that i never think in details about everything. I was calling to discuss about possible solutions but end up i get scold and leaving me felt more distracted because i started to think whether have i make the right decision?whether i started to regret?

Sometimes, i really admired those that have brother and sister by their side. At least, someone is there can help you make decision.I'm helpless now.And felt that i myself have seek all these troubles, if i hadn't resigned, hadn't changed job, everything will just stay constant and no troubles, no worries and no need to think so much about these...rite??So, am i a fool??to seek all these troubles??

Sometimes, i just feel that i want to go home...back AT...i'm tired of life like this..keep on handling decision, and everything on ur own, bear everything on my own..But, i'm just here 3 mths.So easily give up??

God, please guide me...I'm scared.Realli am...

New Lifestyle, new job...everything starts new...

These few days can't have internet connection from home..
No MSN...no chatting....no blogging...

So, now have to curi-curi online in the office...
Received a comment from Sanchoon...realli felt touched, said that i'm a good fren...but, actuali, he is a much nicer fren than me..I owe them a lot..And, now only i know that actuali i talk repeatedly when i'm excited??true or not?shld change this habit la..

Last Wed went to interview. At 1st, plan to take a fake MC...but end up, i really fall sick ady..keep vomiting after lunch..and the whole journey back home from KLCC with the LRT and KTM make me feel extremely sick and uneasy...Vomit several times..At first, promise Siew Ting, Shia Leng and San Choon go shopping at MidValley, end up, they bring me see doctor,take MC and sleep early that nite..

Interview is successful eventhough i'm late half hour...but is nice talking to the CEO..got the job and will start new job next month..just submitted my resignation letter yesterday.

New job is a money brokers...meet bankers..learn financial instruments and need to take exam...pass the exam only will get a license..all paid by the company..i guess, that's a new start which i am eager to try..
But, the office is far yet i don't want to move...will see how la...

Suddenly, felt very grateful cos everyone seems to be so nice and really care about me...I guess the biggest assets i have now is the people around me...eventhough i have nothing valuable in me, still they care and they really do...helping me without asking for any returns..or expecting any returns..

Kath is so nice and supportive like a sister, Michael is so helpful like a brother...where to get such a nice boss and landlord neh??..so is all those supportive and caring MESAT frens...thankyou all very much..

Hope that new job will really make me learn new thgs and a better life...

Getting Sicks...

Started to have a disease attacking me ady...
Dun't feel like talking...
Dun't feel like mixing or chatting or explaining or telling anyone anything...
Just feel like keep to myself and keep quiet...
Just feel like having myself for the day...

This is the same feeling i had previously during beginning of sem6...
When i know that something is wrong with me...
When i know that i must make myself busy so that i'm not thinking of someone...
When i tried not to be angry or get my mood swing because of someone...
Make my life more fun with lots of activities...

Now,i had the same disease again...
Same boredom feel...
I need some changes...
Change a new job...
Find a weekend partime...
Meet other people...
And most important of all, dun keep relying on you...

I'm wrong and i know that...
Now i need to get well...

Gambate YS!!
You done it once...u can do it again...
Time will cured everything...

Stupid...

I'm stupid...
I'm sucks...

Basic knowledge also don't know...
Who is the CEO of Microsoft?...
I can't remember the name...
Air Asia??...
I only know is an Indian...
Can't remember the name...
Now while sitting here, i remember is Tony Fernandez...
But, why just now i can't recall at all...
Stupid!!!

Who is the CEO of Maxis??
I remember is the same person who owned Astro...
I know is an Indian too...
And i have done assignment on Astro...
I should have know the answer...
But, damn it!!
I can't remember...

So goes all the other general knowledge questions...
All burned...

Stupid me...
I'm sucks...

The advice the interviewer gave me is...
"You are just fresh grad...go grab more experience on international markets...read newspaper everyday...after 8 months or one year...come back again and reapply...We do offer highly paid salary and benefits and reward very good commision...but, we only hired certain level of intelligence people to work with us...My advice is quit your admin job and go for a job experience that give you knowledge so that you learn somthing...admin you learn nothing...goodluck in pursuing your dream."

Burned today's interview,but i very appreciate his advice.His right.I shouldn't waste time doing things that does not benefit me in the future.Bought a newspaper.For reading for current biz market.And for applying job too.

Wish me goodluck.I need a new life.I can't stay on depending on just these certain people.One day,if they are no more easily available for me to depend on, i will lost my hanging tree and will get floating, no direction, and may just drown like that.

Regret...

Shouldn't have drink...
Shouldn't have talked...
Shouldn't have asked question..
Shouldn't have answer anything...

Should just remain silent...
Should just go to sleep...
Should just keep quiet...

I just love spending time with you...
Thats all...
I will not ask for anything more...
I will not do anything more...
I will just be your fren..
Whichever way that you feel comfortable...
I will choose to just remain that way...
I will respect you...

Just hope that there are no any embarrassment or any uneasiness feel between us...

A Hard Decision Again....

Why always like that??
Each time i apply for jobs,surely there will be a few good options for me to choose...
Really interested in event management..career opportunities with Marcus Evans...they offered me interview on this Monday...

But now, The Store called me for interview also...is Management Trainee....better career flow,rite?Retail business....but a week later after interview with ME....so,what to do leh??

What if i need to make decision again??Headache la...

Annie will most probably be leaving,moving away from this current rent house....meaning i can't afford the rent alone...too expensive...so, i need to move also??...But, i love this place.Can i not move??Is there any other way??

Haih...sigh....need to find new place to stay again??!!!...Tired la like this...

God!Please show me a small path...show me some light....help me....don't make me so troubling....without transport is damn troublesome!!!Finding new place to stay also troublesome..Hard to find a place just like now...Help me God!!Show me some miracle!!

Dun Regret...Just do it!!!

Today i get a call from Marcus Evans.Have a short phone interview and they requested me to attend an interview this Monday.Happy??or not??Should be happy cos they called.But is not the position i wanted.Wonder if i manage to get in,can i change department in the future??

I have send resume to apply for event management position and sales position too.But, they offered me a sales position..Maybe, that is a good start also..Can build my network??Improve my image??Build self-confidence??

Really hope everything will be smooth this Monday.

This Saturday will be going to Genting,just think about it oso felt happy cos very long,we din have such gathering.I miss all the old good frens.Hope we can realli enjoy this coming weekend.

A bit hesitated whether my current decision is right or wrong?Go or not to go??But, i think just do it la!!!Dun regret!!

Gambate YS!!!

Uncertainty.....

Recently made a very "not like me" decision.Told Kath that i may resigned soon.Ask her to get ready.I just feel bad that i have troubled her a lot because for a new person to take over my current place will take about one month,just like previously i need one month to take over my predecessor's place...

One month to take exam,get access to the system and get familiar with all the task.I like Maersk, its friendly and warm colleagues and super nice superior.Really treat me like a little sis and taking good care of me...

But,i understand that i can't waste time anymore.I know what i want,i'm very sure whether what kind of job i like and i dun't like.Sent resume to Marcus Evans,get call from them.Will fight for an interview chances and must get ready to do the best.I really loves doing event management things,at least it is not as bored as my current office life.Perhaps my new job will make me sacrifies a lot,long working hours,less benefits and maybe not as good pay as in Maersk.

Previously,i will grab jobs that offer better salary and benefits,short working hours...But now, i understand what i need in life..I need to meet more people,see more things,join more activities and search larger network..I want a more interesting life..

But, my current life is definitely not what i have wanted.I can't stand the routine anymore.Meeting the same people everyday.Having lunch and dinner with the same people.And having too much free time during the weekends, wondering how to finish up my weekends.Perhaps,if now i have a boyfriend by my side, i wouldn't feel like that.But, to depends on that,maybe is better for me to depends on myself to settle my own depression.

A new job,new environment,new challenge....

Wish me goodluck :0)

Coffee or Cup??!!...

Hmm..pondering pondering.....quite true in a way

" The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems,but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect."

* A group of graduates, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor.

* Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

* Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups -porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive,some exquisite- telling them to help themselves to the coffee.

* When all the students had a cup of coffee, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the simple and cheap ones.

* While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.

* Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee.

* In most cases, it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink.

* What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... Then you began eyeing each other's cups.

* Now consider this:
- Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups.
- They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of Life we live.
- Sometimes, by concentrating on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us.
Enjoy your coffee!."

* The happiest people don't have the best of everything.

* They just make the best of everything."
1. Live simply.
2. Love generously.
3. Care deeply.
4. Speak kindly.
5. Leave the rest to God.

You are the miracle, my friend;
Your life either shines a light OR casts a shadow!
Shine a light & Enjoy the Coffee!!!

What is LOVE all about...

***To My Friends Who Are ***
SINGLE
Love is like a butterfly .
The more you chase it , the more it eludes you.
But if you just let it fly, it will come to you when you least expect it.
Love can make you happy but often it hurts ,but love's only special when you give it to someone who is really worth it.
So take your time and choose the best.

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
NOT SO SINGLE
Love isn't about becoming somebody else's "perfect person."
It's about finding someone who helps you become the best person you can be.

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
PLAYBOY/GIRL TYPE

Never say "I love you" if you don't care.
Never talk about feelings if they aren't there.
Never touch a life if you mean to break a heart .
Never look in the eye when all you do is lie.
The cruelest thing a guy can do to a girl is to let her fall in love when he doesn't intend to catch her fall and it works both ways...

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
MARRIED

Love is not about "it's your fault",but "I'm sorry" .
Not "where are you", but "I'm right here."
Not "how could you", but "I understand."
Not "I wish you were", but "I'm thankful you are."

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
ENGAGED

The true measure of compatibility is not the years spent together but how good you are for each other.

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
HEARTBROKEN

Heartbreaks last as long as you want and cut as deep as you allow them to go.
The challenge is not how to survive heartbreaks but to learn from them .

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
NAIVE

How to be in love: Fall but don't stumble, be consistent but not too persistent, share and never be unfair,understand and try not to demand, and get hurt but never keep the pain.

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
POSSESSIVE

It breaks your heart to see the one you love is happy with someone else but it's more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you.

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
AFRAID TO CONFESS

Love hurts when you break up with someone.
It hurts even more when someone breaks up with you.
But love hurts the most when the person you love has no idea how you feel.

*** To My Friends Who Are ***
STILL HOLDING ON

A sad thing about life is when you meet someone and fall in love,only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and that you have wasted years on someone who wasn't worth it.
If he isn't worth it now he's not going to be worth it a year or 10years from now.
Let go.....

Love my Current L!F3........

Today is 23 July 2007...

Been in Subang Jaya area for about one month and a week plus...
Starting to love this place a lot..

My company is very nice, warm and friendly place to work in...
Everyday, will always jokes with colleagues, smile a lot and have some occasion once a while. I have a very nice department "ah head". So coincident, she also from the same hometown, same dialect wth me.She very take care of me..Feel quite happy to work wth her. Really seldom get a boss that actually more like your fren and not really wil get mad at u or scold u or anythg.We share quite a lot among us.Just like getting a new fren here.

At first, live in a rent room,empty room, alone, not sharing room,everyday wil take KTM from SetiaJaya to SubangJaya to work.Just one station only.Then, during weekends is damn bored cos nothing to do and no entertainment.

But, i owe a big deal to a bunch of my MESAT frens.Reali help me a lot.Especially Samuel, help me find place to stay,help me move house and get familiar wth Subang area. Then, need to thanks Wei Tiong,Chuan Tong and Daphne for bringing me out to places, go for dinners, activities,etc.Siew Ting,San Choon,Lai Seng and Ding is nice too making my weekends got places to go and not just stay at room.

Then,dunno how...i'm quite lucky..to know a nice colleague,now is my roomate and getting closer wth her..get to rent a nice place two weeks later..nice landlord...nice environment...just happy and very satisfied wth everythg...

Hope that things will get better and nice things will keep staying.....

p/s: suddenly have the urge of adding you back in my MSN list, feel like wan to chat wth you,knowing how r u lately....but i forgotten your email address....does that means i started to become normal liao??

A New Start...

Today is 10 June 2007

Tommorrow i'll be in Subang Jaya...around 9pm somthing at nite...starting my new life in KL...Will start work in Shah Alam in an international logistics company...M company..on 13 June.

The staffs in this company is good...very warm and i even receive a welcoming card with everyone's signature on it...the perception on this company is really nice...make me think of all the nice things of working there...but, i still dunno when i really join in this co...will it be as wat i have in my mind now??...or i will be worst??...will i like my job??...will i be happy with my new life in a place far from my family??

The new place that i'm gonna stay by tommorrow will be a room in an apartment....same apartment with one of my schoolmate...but different block...will be staying with two indian gals housemate....dunno will i be ok there??...used of staying there??...will i be bored??...cos there will soon be no internet connection for me cos i dun have my own laptop to online...and the company actually have some IT security rules to be follow...include not allow to be chatting outside business use...and not allow to view website that is non-business....this means that i will have lesser time to blog in here....and maybe can change it to handwritting diary soon....if i need to talk to someone...

I dunno whether my frens around KL area will always come and find me out ma??....but of course they surely have their own things to do....wonder how will i be spending my free time after work....and during those non-working days...as i work 5 days only....finis work by evening....very near my house....and how should i spend those time neh??...if without internet connection....and no money to go shopping yet...???!!!!...how to spend the time neh??

Hope i will like the life in KL la...

Hard to Mak3 Decision la.....

Why making decision is so hard??
Why must there always be choices to let me choose??
I hate choosing and make decision…
Every decision made seem so hard and so insecure, seem to be wrong and scared that I’ll regret of the choice I made later…

Got offer for job oso make me fan…
No offer for job oso make me fan…
Haih….

Now got a job offer from M company…a big shipping company and very famous too…
But the is an office administration job…which I dun really like…but the offer is good and the job location, not much to worry cos have know some frens there that really can help me get familiar with that place…everythg sound nice and good enuf…But, the problem is I know if I accept this job, it would only be a temporary job for me since it is not something I really like…perhaps longest I stay will be 1 year if there is no career advancement…

The 2nd choice is a ‘marketing executive’ position with a jeweler company, subsidiary of RS company…oso quite a famous company. I like this one more….organizing and planning events, promotion and projects…sound so interesting and fun, get to meet people and do different kind of job…maybe it will turn out to be my long-term career…But the problem is, this interview were scheduled later than the previous mentioned job…which means if I accept the M company…I must reject this RS company…Then, I only have 50/50 confidence in getting this RS company offer. And, maybe this RS can’t offer that high compared with M company ler…

Very disturbing when thinking wat decision to made…if accept M…will lost the opportunity of getting a job that I like (RS)…but if reject M, then probably I won’t get any job in the end if RS doesn’t want me…How ler???

So wish that I have no choice and only one choice in front of me that I can just take it without thinking so much….

Or itz I think too much liao…think of long-term…just do it 1st la….no need think too long 1st ma….rite??

If only got one person that can just give me order and I just follow it….no need to think this and that….consequences and effects….haiyo!!!!!!!

FAN FAN FAN laaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Moment to Think....

A Moment to Think....

Some Encouragement.....

Just a Sharing....

Have a little Thoughts....

Some Words to Share........

Some Words for Thoughts....

Beautiful Words...

Interviews....

Today is 14 May, just bought a ticket to KL for tomorrow 330pm…estimated will reach KL around 8pm..

Then will meet LM…really feel bad because need to trouble him even though he is busy with his work…I still need to use up his time…but felt really glad cos know this fren, if not, how I go KL for interview ah??...A stranger in a strange place for me…not familiar and dun really know anyone there…Sometimes, I feel myself quite lucky too even though I’m not a very lucky gal that get to have all my wishes come true…and I need to put in a lot effort if I want something…not a very lucky gal…but at least, times that I felt stucked and helpless, the God always do show me some light…there is always a small path for me to go on whenever I thought I have come to a dead end road….the God always show me a side path….Thanks God!!

Arranged the interview date on 17 May…at first is 2 interview only…but then, saw an advertisement in newspaper…is the same building…so why not give it a try?...so now, have 3 interviews to go…

3 of the interview is not the kind of job I really like…but just give it a try la…I just want to earn some money within this 3 months if possible…before convocation….Convocation need to spend a lot of money again…Haih…Now really regret that I’m not a saving person…very broke at the moment…Why I spend so much neh??...What did I spend neh??

Mum not really like me to go work in KL..she keep on mentioning about how dangerous life was in the city…How difficult I will be if I work in the city….How I dun have nice and nutritious food to eat…and all sort of others…But, mum, I really need to go outside…Just let me live outside for a year or two…if it is suffering oso, let me suffer first, only I will be willing to admit and come back…If I haven’t tried, I won’t die heart de…Sorry,mum...i really have to try it…

These few days at home, meet up with a lot of old frens…frens that are not just hi-bye fren like those in the uni…Meet up with SL on Thurs…went out wth her…chat a few…then in Sat, yum cha with PE…chat a lot…and it feel so nice because it has really been a long time since I have a long heart-to-heart chat wth a fren….i’m glad that I still have u guys…really glad….then on Sun, SL & CS come find me at my house…CS ady married with 2 sons..the first son is even ady 5 yrs old…time really pass by so fast…SL is still the same old SL…her attitude and the way she talk no changes at all….it has been about 3 yrs no meet her liao…but, maybe in future, we will have more chance to met up la…

This time go KL will meet up wth ST…wonder whether we will oso have a long chat…since we have whole day to spend for each other….the only one fren that I not met up wth is SK…SK has been so busy recent years…with her works and her life….only met each other during CNY…

Frens…I’m grad too tis time…so will join u all in the working life la…hope we can go along the same pace and yet have time for each other la…Really hope can earn money fast…

Happy Birthday.....

Today is someone's birthday....happy birthday la...
Wish to wish you by sms or even call you....but end up, forget about it la...
So just manage to wish you here cos i'm ego too....

Bad mood for these two days....
Why??
Stupid computer play games with me again....
Printer not functioning....turn out is the printer head problem...change a new head is around RM110 plus ink ler...all about RM150-170 estimate amount...
Or buy a new printer....RM150....but the guy recommend me buy the RM330 type...sure la...you want to do business...sure you will say how good is the RM330 de...and how not good is the RM150 de....
But, the main thing is i'm broke...so no matter how, you can't get business from me ....not RM150 or RM330...sorry la...
So, the decision is leave out the printer thing....no printer at the moment...

Then, turn out i can't connect to the internet...spend whole day calling the services centre of TMNET...useless...what ever method they teach me oso useless....
A bit faint la...and frustrated of course...cos i need to online urgently just to resend a resume to a company that already promised me an interview but then ask me to resend them my resume...headache la....why all things not in their smooth way at the moment???

Then, today...i get a call from the same company again...but this time is from the person in charge in a higher position de...haha....my interview appointment is fixed la...no need resend resume la....then check the modem settings in my computer...found a things called modem helper....so give it a try...turn out is my cable that used to connect the phone line is not functioning...haih....give me trouble whole day...!!!!????

PC ah!!PC!!!...pls la dun give me trouble anymore la...dun let me waste money anymore la....i really is very broke now.....even have to borrow more money from mum just to go KL for interview....so poor at the moment....no PTPTN....and realise that my savings account is very limited amount only....cham la...this time how to survive ah???


Hope the interview can success lor....but got two company wor....if both oso success, want choose which one ah??....sommore hope the salary is good lor...need to find money for rent house, transport etc....i'm broke and poor gal now....

Dun make me need to spend unnecessary money again la....pls,GOD....help me!!!

Reach Home Today....

Just reach home today....
The feeling is .....dunno how to say??...
First, tired of carrying the luggage from my college walk to bus stop and till home...
Even though, i ady put just all the ringan ringan things...but still feel so heavy ah...my hand and shoulder oso aching la....just carry one luggage nia...

Shld be wondering how come my last sem liao...so few things??...actually need to thanks TF lor...help me brings a few big and heavy luggages...
Been helping me a lot for these 3 years...really dunno how to thank him....such a nice and real gentleman....I oso dunno how come i get so lucky to know a friend like him...always smiling face eventhough everytime i just bring him trouble and never get to help him back...thks very very much la....TF!!

Spend the whole day cleaning my bed, my table (full of dust), my room and unpacking my bags.....

Dinner today was splendid...very miss mum's cooking lor...but then, realise that mum is aging...getting old....
She complain about chest pain...hand ache...leg ache...old ppl's sickness....i felt so helpless becos i can't do anythg or give any advice to ease her pain.
Suddenly feel mum is getting older while i'm still unemployed, unable to do anythg for her, unable to make her more comfortable, unable to let her retired earlier....

Sometimes, really wished that i have an older brother or an older sister....then, at least i won't feel such a heavy responsibility...the responsibility of taking care of mum and giving a better life to my family...
Even though, they never request anythg from me..but, i still feel that i have the responsibility to do so...tired when thinking about how to fast fast make my family go a better life especially mum...Wish to give her a trip to oversea...she wish to go China...when will i get to have enuf $$ to bring her for a tour there??....Mother's Day coming this sunday.....i love u mum!!..But, i never said it out to you...and never buy any present for you or do anythg special for you....but, really hope i can did somthg for you real soon....

CL said that i'm over protective of myself...said that i'm unwilling to share thgs wth others, my stories,etc...is true...i admit that...the ppl in uni knew very little about me and my background cos i seldom talk about it...But, i dun feel that is wrong, if the person really sincere in being my fren, why shld he/she ask or know so much about my family and my background??...as long as they like me and my personality..thats enough,isn't it?

I dun like to talk about my family is bcos i dun wan ppl to take me as wat backgrd i have...nowadays, ppl so care abt status, about who u r, wat kind of connection u have....i just want a fair competition...i dun wan ppl judge me by tat way...i wan them to judge me just based on me...is tat wrong??...But, i dun care anymore...if u guys dun udstd me...then is up to you...i still have a bunch of high school schoolmates that really knows and udstd me..i miss u guys....PE,SL,SL,SK & ST....u guys are the best that never leave me alone even some long and many years...still there for me whenever i'm sad and in trouble...

Unofficially Graduate....

Finally is 7 May 2007....
Just finish my Management Information System paper (TID)....
Before entering the exam hall,...feel like totally in NO CONFIDENT condition...
Don't even know what i'm reading and don't even know whether i can did extremely bad in this paper and blow all my efforts on other paper...
But now, feel so RELEASE....
Can do the paper but not to say did it well...
But at least won't waste up other subjects de efforts lar...

Now feel so free and relaxing...
No more exam and i'm a free gal now....
No practicum to take away my time and now is waiting to go for interview la...
Will be heading to KL next week...
Have two interviews to attend...
Hope can get a job that i like plus good salary lor...

Two more days in UUM...
Saw you today in the exam hall...
You look bad....can't do well???
But, i know that you will be able to cope...
Jia you la...one more sem here....did better for your paper before you really grad...
Perhaps i won't have any chance to have few last words with you....
Perhaps pretty soon....i'll be forgetting you...
Since i have delete your contact and plan to change a new number soon...
Since i be having a new environment and won't be seeing you anymore...
But, just want to say...i still have you in my mind once....before....whether you have me in your mind or not....i never did anything that i feel hurting others...

Wish you all the best...
Wish me all the best...
Wish us will be having a better life in the future...
Goodbye UUM....
And goodbye to you too....

Finish 5 papers...

Is 3 May 2007...

Just back from exam...
Today have two papers...
Multinational Corporation and Insurance Cargo.....

Both paper is my course paper...
Can answer both all the question.....
Better than previous 3 papers....
Hope can get A for both paper la...

After these two paper, felt so release.....because suddenly my burden are all gone....
This semester none of the papers that i feel can score well...
Really wished can get one or two As for this semester because i can't let my PMK drop ler...
No do practicum...my results is all depends on this time de final exam la...
Most of the paper get very high carry marks...
Among the highest in the class....but my final exam, i don't have the confidence of doing it well...
Except this two paper.....really hope dear God can help me la....

No more exams after these....
Actually two more paper to go lar....
What i mean is really graduate liao....
No more asignments,....no more classes....no more exams....no more carry marks...

Heading to the working life after this....
Wonder whats the adventure will be waiting for me out there??
Will be leaving UUM this 9 May.....
Really no more regrets??
No more words??

Don't you ever want to say something to me before i leave??
Things were so sour that it be memories for me forever.....in this UUM....there will always be something i felt regret of....

First Day of Exam....Sucks!!!

Just finish my first exam for tis semester...
Human Resources Management.....
It sucks...
The worst paper i ever did.....should said is second worst...
The first worst is Logistics...but both cases is different....Logistics paper i admitted it because i really didn't touch on it..not even a chapter and not even tried to answer a question in it....

But this HR paper is a paper that i totally blown it....
Why?? Because is just a 2000+ paper...categorized into easy paper...but i can't do...
I read the book just not finishing two chapters only but still couldn't answer it....
I never felt so without confident in my exam that i have read except this paper....
Sucks!!!!
Bad mood!!!!
Why???
I have lost all my interest in studies....
First paper should have more time to concentrate on it....
But i dun have the mood to study and results....is this...total regret!!!

Sometimes i just feel that i'm so stupid....
Why there are so many times that i'll be regretting certain events only after it have happens and i couldn't do any changes anymore....
Can't i learn to be cleverer??
Why i never learn from experience??
A lot of times is whenever i know my mistakes, i'll repeat the same mistakes again....

Coming next is a lot more exams to cope....
YS!!!!!study lar....dun waste time liao.....

p/s: Have a chat with you, as if we are frens, actually there are lots more i want to know....but still feel that i shouldn't break or disturb the "fren feel" environment....so just follow the chat the way you want it....really this is how it ends???....the uni is ending.....no truth to be discover???...does it means that i'll just be assuming on my own perception about the truth, is up to me to think of u as a bad character or as a nice character??....

Present Day??!!!

Today is a very lucky day....

Even though the morning started with not a so nice morning...
A MNC presentation screwed up....we had put in music but the music not work....i have do the timing but still not able to finish in time....in short, everything not turn out as what we have planned....

But, luckily, the lecturer still said that our group is better compared with others....i lost the chances of getting extra point by asking question today....and this Thursday will be the last class...but i won't be showing up as i have to attend the Custom Course....

Time is getting nearer to the end of the semester....i wondered whether i will regret of anything before i leave this uni....there are still some people that i wish i could clear up some words with them...but, egoness have make it quite impossible....

I look at this person...and really wishes that i could have a conversation with this person...clear up evrything...whether is a misunderstanding or is not....i just hope to listen about the truth from this person own mouth....still not die heart yet??...perhaps, i'm such a person....

Then, lastnite, a very touchy short message written by my roomate...is actually in chinese...but the meaning is...

叶子掉下了, 是风吹走了它还是树不要它?
叶子掉下了, 是风的无情还是树的不挽留?
如果树珍惜叶子就不会然风带走,
如果你不住动爱惜一段感情,
当它离开你而去时,
是你放弃还是你未曾珍惜过它.....

the leaf is dropping, itz the wind who blow it away or the tree who don't want it?
the leaf is dropping, itz the wind that is cruel or the tree that don't want to hold it anymore?
if the tree have cherished the leaf, it wouldn't have let the wind take it away....
if you doesn't take the effort to cherish a relationship,
then when it leave you,
is you the one who give up or that you never cherish it before??

p/s: i never think of giving you up..i just want you to do more, to let me feel secure, to let me really know for sure how you feel towards me...but perhaps, my attitude let you misunderstand my meaning..or is you really never are sincere at all??....are you the one who is giving up??

I just suddenly feel this short passage so touching....feel that i'm the leaf that not been cherished by this tree....but, this leaf have yet leave the tree....it still hang weakly on the tree.....waiting for a strong wind to blow it away or waiting for a little bit longer time to let it drop off......

Each time, my mood will swing when i see you....you still have the power to influence my day....why???why???making my morning a bit dull.....


Later, in the evening, i received a small gift from a fren....a fren that i dun really know....but met during the trip to Genting....i was surprised when i receive this fren's gift and invitation and message and now we are contacting thru MSN....most surprisingly, is this fren even noticed me during the time in Genting, the time that i'm not feeling happy, the time that my eye is still sick and swollen, the time that i feel myself is in the ugliest condition....

Then, is my last CCM class...a class that i enjoyed most....the lecturer that i loved most....i hope to be still in contact with this lecturer...we have a small party and exchanging gift....i didn't even prepared any gift to exchange with them....but will make up for that...cos is YF take my gift....so today, i get to receive two gift....which is quite a lot....

Hope that evrything will turn out fine.....just few more weeks to go......

你懂得什么是爱情吗？

开始的开始总是甜蜜的。
后来就有了厌倦、习惯、背弃、寂寞、绝望和冷笑。
曾经渴望与一个人长相厮守，后来，多么庆幸自己离开了？
曾几何时，在一段短暂的时光里，我们以为自己深深的爱着的一个人。
后来，我们才知道，那不是爱，那只是对自己说谎。
你以为不可失去的人，原来并非不可失去。你流干了眼泪，自有另一个人逗你欢笑。
你伤心欲绝，然后发现不爱你的人，根本不值得你为之伤心。
今天回首，何尝不是一个喜剧？情尽时，自有另一番新境界，
所有的悲哀也不过是历史。
爱情总是想象比现实美丽，相逢如是，告别亦如是。
我们以为爱得很深、很深，来日岁月，会让你知道，它不过很浅、很浅。
最深最重的爱，必须和时日一起成长。
因为爱情的缘故，两个陌生人可以突然熟络到睡在同一张床上。
然而，相同的两个人，
在分手时却说，
我觉得你越来越陌生。
爱情将两个人由陌生变成熟悉，又由熟悉变成陌生。
爱情正是一个将一对陌生人变成情侣，
又将一对情侣变成陌生人的游戏。
相信爱情可以令一个人改变，
是年轻的好处，也是年轻的悲哀。浪子永远是浪子。
令男人改变的，也许是上帝的爱或者佛祖的慈悲，但绝对不会是女人。
最不宜结婚的是浪子，最适宜结婚的也是浪子。
往往不是女人改变一个浪子，而是女人在浪子想改变的时候刚好出现。
男人的一生，不过对女人做两件事：
超乎她想象的好和超乎她想象的坏。
女人用他的好来原谅他的坏。如果有一天他们不能在一起，
不是他太坏，而是她太好。
我们一生之中，要牢记和要忘记的东西一样多。
记忆存在细胞里，在身体里面，与肉体永不分离，要摧毁它，等于玉石俱焚。
然而，有些事情必须忘记，
忘记痛苦，
忘记最爱的人对你的伤害，
只好如此。
时间会让你了解爱情，时间能够证明爱情，
也能够把爱推翻。
没有一种悲伤是不能被时间减轻的。
如果时间不可以令你忘记那些不该记住的人，我们失去的岁月又有什么意义？
如果所有的悲哀、痛苦、失败都是假的，那该多好？
可惜，世上有很多假情假义，
自己的痛苦、失败、悲哀，却偏偏总是真的。
他纵有千个优点，但他不爱你，
这是一个你永远无法说服自己去接受的缺点。
一个人最大的缺点不是自私、多情、野蛮、任性，而是偏执地爱一个不爱自己的人。
暗恋是一种自毁，是一种伟大的牺牲。暗恋，甚至不需要对象，
我们不过站在河边，看着自己的倒影自怜，
却以为自己正爱着别人。
爱情和情歌一样，最高境界是余音袅袅。
最凄美的不是报仇雪恨，而是遗憾。最好的爱情，必然有遗憾。
那遗憾化作余音袅袅，长留心上。
最凄美的爱，不必呼天抢地，只是相顾无言。
失望，有时候，也是一种幸福。因为有所期待，才会失望。
遗憾，也是一种幸福。因为还有令你遗憾的事情。
追寻爱情，然后发现，
爱，从来就是一件千回百转的事。
最浪漫的爱是得不到的。
最浪漫的情话，是当哪个已经跟你分了手的人打电话来问："你好吗？"
你稀松平常地回答："我很好。"
而其实你还爱着他，你一点也不好。
男人伪装坚强，只是害怕被女人发现他软弱。
女人伪装幸福，只是害怕被男人发现她伤心。
爱情，有时候，是一件令人沉沦的事情，
所谓理智和决心，不过是可笑的自我安慰的说话。
爱情从来都是一种束缚，追求爱情并不等于追求自由。
自由可贵，我们用这最宝贵的东西换取爱情。
因为爱一个人，明知会失去自由，
也甘愿作出承诺。
诺言是用来跟一切的变幻抗衡。
变幻原是永恒，我们唯有用永恒的诺言制约世事的变幻。
不能永恒的，便不是诺言。
诺言是很贵的，如果你尊重自己的人格。
爱是有安全感，又没有安全感。
爱是一种震撼，也是一种无力感。
爱是诱惑，也惟有爱能给你力量抗拒诱惑。
爱是忠诚，可是爱也会令你背叛。
一个人负心，或许是因为他的记忆力不好。
他忘记了，所以他能够负心；不是因为他负心，所以他忘记了。
以前种种，他并非完全忘记，但他记忆力太差了，往事已经不再深刻，
很快就被新的记忆取代，只记得新人的欢笑，
忘记旧人的笑脸。
懂爱的女人通常输得很惨。
爱情本来就是残忍的，胜者为王。
感情可以转帐，婚姻可以随时冻结，激情可以透支，爱情善价而沽。
是的，在这细小的都市里，这就是我们的生活。
今天的长相厮守，只是尽力而为而已。
最安全和最合时宜的方式，还是和自己厮守
一个钱币最美丽的状态，不是静止，
而是当它像陀螺一样转动的时候，没人知道，即将转出来的那一面，
是快乐或痛苦，是爱还是恨。
快乐和痛苦，爱和恨，总是不停纠缠。
所谓缘分，也和发明一样吧，都是源于偶然。
爱情也是一种发明，需要不断改良。
只是，这种发明跟其他发明不一样，
它没有专利权，随时会给人抢走。
愈害怕失去的人，愈容易失去。
愈想得到，就愈要放手。放手是很难的，但是别无选择。
世上有很多东西是可以挽回的，
比如良知，比如体重。
但不可挽回的东西更多，譬如旧梦，譬如岁月，譬如对一个人的感觉。
放弃一个很爱你的人并不痛苦，
放弃一个你很爱的人才是痛苦。
食物可以有标签，说明"请在此之前食用"。
女人不是食物，青春是有期限的，忍耐也是有期限的，
请在期限期满之前好好爱她，好好照顾她，
因为她是逾时不候的。
万物有时，怀抱有时，爱情也有时序。
爱情有生、老、病、死。爱情总在不知不觉间过期。
有一天，
我们把它拿出来，
才知道它最鲜活的日子已经永远过去。
在最有感觉的时候，她没有停下脚步，
那么，也不必在一起走完那段路之后，回头去寻找那些散落在地上的感觉，
路已经走完。
爱情中最伤感的时刻是后期的冷淡，
一个曾经爱过你的人，忽然离你很远，咫尺之隔，却是天涯。
曾经轰轰烈烈，曾经千回百转，曾经沾沾自喜，曾经柔肠寸断。
到了最后，
最悲哀的分手竟然是悄无声息。
有相逢就有别离，
可是每个人都害怕别离。
大家都知道，最后一次的别离就是死亡。
我们口里说"天下无不散之宴席"，
心里却舍不得喝掉手中的酒，还想再唱一支歌，再唱一支歌。
你可不可以不走？
很高兴你能看到这里.
或许,你的心里正在发生一些细微的变化
是吗?
爱情------这是一个永恒而又年青的话题,
每一个爱情故事里一定有精彩的片断,
相信爱,爱就会可爱

Time Flies so Fast.....

Just left about one month before i really ends my uni life in tis UUM....
Two weeks left before all classes ends and final exam starts...
Just one month left to meet all the people that gonna meet each time went to classes....
After tis one month,...i'm not gonna be back here anymore and some ppl are not gonna meet anymore....

Will there be regrets??
Will there be any actions that i missed out to do before this one month ends??
Will there be any words that i hope i can said before this one month ends??
Will there be any memories that i hope to create before this one month ends??
Will there be places that i should have visits before i leave Kedah and this northern part???

Suddenly feels that time flies real fast....
I just felt as if i just come in this uni and register myself yesterday....
The orientation....the people....the events....the trips....the photos....
All these soon gonna just be memories.....
And only can be review through photos....
No more adjustments can be made....
Just this last month....

Brave to L0v3.......

往往许多人在抉择伴侣时，容易东想西想，不知所措，就是因为害怕一时做错决定，看错人，造成终生的遗憾。

诺贝尔文学奖得主萧伯纳说：「此时此刻在地球上，约有两万个人适合当你的人生伴侣，就看你先遇到哪一个，如果在第二个理想伴侣出现之前，你已经跟前一个人发展出相知相惜、互相信赖的深层关系，那后者就会变成你的好朋友，但是若你跟前一个人没有培养出深层关系，感情就容易动摇、变心，直到你与这些理想伴侣候选人的其中一位拥有稳固的深情，才是幸福的开始，漂泊的结束」

爱上一个人不需要靠努力，只需要靠「际遇」，是上天的安排，但是「持续地爱一个人」就要靠「努力」，在爱情的经营中，顺畅运转的要素就是沟通、体谅、包容与自制(面临诱惑有所自制)。有许多人总是为「际遇」所迷惑与苦恼，意念不停、欲念不断、争逐不散，而忘了培养经营感情的能力才是幸福的关键。

所以不要去追问到底谁才是我的Mr. Right，而是要问说在眼前的伴侣关系中，我能努力到什么程度、成长到什么程度，若没有培养出经营幸福的能力，就算真的 Mr. Right出现在你身边，幸福依然会错过的，而活在犹疑与遗憾当中，这不就是许多「爱情虚无症」的遭遇与心态吗？

若你此刻已有一位长久相伴的伴侣，不要再随便三心二意地犹疑了，我们往往不易察觉感情中的一个陷阱，就是「近亲生慢侮」，也就是经济学中的铁律「边际效益递减法则」，跟你在一起越久的人，就越容易麻木与忽视，而新鲜的「际遇」总是那么动人可爱。

在感情对待中，难免有摩擦与无心的伤害，而且论得罪自己的次数累加起来最多的人，当然是跟我们在一起最久、最亲近的人。而新欢呢，又还没开始有得罪你的机会，再加上他的刻意讨好，所以新欢怎么看怎么可爱，旧爱怎么看怎么讨厌。

但别忘了，新欢身上总是有不确定的未知数，旧爱身上就是有难得的熟悉感、确定感、信赖感。千万不要随便在偶然的「际遇」中迷失了自己，错放了幸福温暖的手。

所以萧伯纳的话，是要提醒情人不要太钻牛角尖于寻觅那唯一，应该把精神用在学会经营幸福的能力上，同时也提醒我们「溺水三千只取一瓢饮」若有幸遇到了难得的伴侣，就不要再三心二意了，因为我们永远不知道一生何时会遇到两万个其中的几个，所以要知福惜福 、活在当下

勇气
终于作了这个决定
别人怎么说我不理
只要你也一样的肯定

我愿意天涯海角都随你去
我知道一切不容易
我的心一直温习说服自己
最怕你忽然说要放弃

爱真的需要勇气来面对流言蜚语
只要你一个眼神肯定
我的爱就有意义

我们都需要勇气
去相信会在一起
人潮拥挤我能感觉你
放在我手心里你的真心

当你爱的人不爱你了

当他不爱你的时候，无论过去他爱过后来却忘了；当你无法成为他心里的那个人的时候，他的心便不会记得你。虽然他知道你深爱他，但他宁可选择装作不知道。

当他不爱你的时候，请不要在你不开心、或遇到麻烦时去打搅他。他那儿绝对不是你此刻应该的去处。也许他会在接到你电话时，淡淡地安慰你几句，却也仅此而已；也许你会再想要一点什么，于是说：“我们见面吧！”而他肯定心有烦躁了。当他不爱你的时候，你的爱和你本人，就会显得廉价许多。你占了下风，这是人的本性。他会说：“好，不过我现在有点事，晚点的时候你再给我电话吧。或者我给你电话也可以。”而你这时千万不要当真，他只是找了个不是很高明的理由来搪塞你。请，不要真的去等，不要骗自己。

当他不爱你的时候，请不要与他讲你的琐事。也许此刻，你不过是希望让彼此更熟悉一些。只是，他已无暇、也没兴趣去了解你，你的生活你的过去你的长处和短处与他何干？即使讲了，他也会很快忘记，就如他忘记你的生日你的地址你的电话一样。没有爱，于是你注定挤不进他的生命。即使你要的哪怕只是一个很小很小的角落。

当他不爱你的时候，请不要在他的面前流泪。不要在生病的时候告诉他，他无法给予你照顾和关心，至多是同情一下。而请骄傲的你，不要放弃本来属于你的骄傲。虽然太多的人，在爱的面前丢失了自己，何来骄傲？只是要记住：只有爱自己的人，才可以真正的去疼惜你。而不是旁观的同情、怜悯。

当他不爱你的时候，你的爱便是他的负担。不要计较对与错，这样会快乐些。要记住，你与他之间的爱，变成了你用心、他无心。所以，不要怪他，因为也许他也想做好一些，对你不要那样的冷漠。知道吗，爱一个人、对一个人好，本来就是一种本能。对不起，他已没有这种本能了。

当他不爱你的时候，请不要失去自信。因为爱一个人，并非他的优秀，而只是一种感觉。他让你有了这样的感觉，于是你爱他。同样，他不爱你，也并非你不优秀。优秀，不是爱的理由！看看还有那么多爱自己的人，淡淡地微笑一下，也是异样甜美的。

当他不爱你的时候，也一定要祝福他。有了爱，便不该有恨。爱是美好的，恨却丑陋。何必让生命中最美好的东西化作丑恶呢？也不要觉得不公平。因为他失去的是一个爱他的人，而你失去的是一个不爱你的人，却得到了一个重新生活、重新去爱的机会。

请不要去想到“永远”，爱没有永远。你此刻深爱，却注定遥远的某一天也不再爱他。他只是比你早一步到达这一天。当他不爱你的时候，请轻轻拥抱一下回忆里的温暖，轻柔地凝视凋谢的温柔。

当他不爱你的时候，亲爱的，请你深深呼吸，人生的路上铺满了爱的花蕾，总有那么一朵属于你，不是安慰你，而是，这生生世世早已注定。相信我，也相信你自己！

去找一个喜欢自己多过自己喜欢的人

Tired....

How come all the assignments are never ending de???
Very tired oh....
Still got two asgnmt and 3 presentation oh....
One more midsem....so late de midsem!!!???
Just two weeks left is final exam liao....
Why everythg still not settle yet????
Tired ler...
I need some rest before prepare for final ler....

I want rest.....

A Few Nice Quote....

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you..

2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.

3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can' t have them

6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.

7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.

8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.

9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.

10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.

11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.

12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.

13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.

REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.

These few quotes is from an email my fren send to me...and it touches my heart....yes, whatever happens, happens for a reason...as i on the way of going back to my home...at suddenly realise that every scene that i saw today (from a seat on a bus) and the scene that i saw every other time ( from a seat in a car)....same scene, same place, same road, same journey but it gives me a different feel....why today i feel that it looks much nicer and more scenetic view??
I must try to look further and from a higher position....look wider and i'll feel the differents....

YS!!Gambateh!!!

Water Crisis Runaway....

Today is 26th march...
Is the second day UUM no water...
I still go to class today at 9am morning....
After the 9-10am class, get the news that UUM is giving two days holidays for today and tomorrow due to water crisis....
Meaning that there won't be any water available for at least two days....!!!!

Then meet YY on the way, she said: let's go back lor...we manage to catch the bus to Lumut from Butterworth if we buy direct bus 12pm from UUM-B'worth....

I was thinking of going back too....How to survive without water for two days???....Plus this morning, my 'auntie visit' me for the first day....Horrible life if no water....

But, actually there is a Seminar presentation later at 11am...then tonite got FIS Dinner...my faculty dinner which i bought a ticket for rm25 ler....and even preparing to go....then got presentation on Tuesday and Wednesday....and Custom Course to attend on Thursday and Friday....so hectic schedule ler....

But, dunno wat sudden urge has got into me...I rush to buy ticket...tat's 10.30am...then rush back college and do some packaging....within an hour and rush to Masjid to board on the 12pm bus....because of rushing, i dun even know what to bring and what shouldn't bring....

From DKG to Masjid, i need to take Laluan B bus and that time was so full of people....that i actually need to stand for the journey but a very nice gal offer me her seat saying that she is going off soon....that was lucky.

Then, the 12pm UUM-B'worth bus is a first come first serve bus....everyone was fighting to go on the bus. As i see the crowd, i get scared and thinking that i surely won't be able to win the fight, i decide to just stand aside and wait for next bus...Then, the bus is full and the crowd is clear....Suddenly, i saw a gal coming down from the bus with bags....Thinking in my heart that "this is the opportunity"....I get to go on the bus because just got one vacancy....Haha! a lucky surprise!

Reach Butterworth just 2.05pm....miss the 2pm bus...aiyah!because just now the driver drive so slow....then, have a "hokkien mee" with another hometown fren that back tgthr wth me, CS...a nice long chat wth her....we get to go back with 330pm bus...tgthr with YY too....

Reaching home, i realised that i forget to bring quite a few things....and my FIS Dinner ticket "boil soup" liao....because the dinner is still on despite of no water....and i know that a lot of people oso like me...bought the ticket liao but burn it because of going back....actually, i hope i get to go the dinner and take a lot a lot of photos with my coursemates and a lot of frens....since is our final sem liao....

And now is doubting whether i should go back on Wed and attend Custom on Thurs and Fri.....or just skip everything and back on Sat....???

Then there is an Insurance Cargo assignment to submit on 2 April....just one week time...but, we haven't started anything yet....so daring!!....But, up to my group members lar....i don't seem to bother....

And most of all, i dun regret that i suddenly make such a quick decision to come back and worried about others behind it.....cos it is so nice to be at home....and most of all, i miss u,MUM!!! and i love u too!!!

No Water Again....

Haiyo...no water again...

This time is because there is a damage of water pipe somewhere in Jitra and it affected Jitra, Bukit Kayu Hitam and UUM area....The news said at least 2/3 days no water....Hope the water will come very very soon lar...

Three years in UUM always got water problem....all sort of reason as why there is no water supplies...During sem1,is the first time experience, so sure will panic and anxious, keep a lot of water and even in the middle of the nite oso got get water whenever the water lorry come....but as time goes by, more clever liao lor...and got more experience liao lor...not so anxious and worried anymore....

Last time, i have a crazy thinking...think that maybe they purposely cut of the water supplies, to see us suffer a few days or for just a few hours...so that we all look so worried and looking for water everywhere....or maybe they want to train us....to let us tried different lifestyle....how to live whenever there is no water...all sort of imagination....

But now, i realise that is just a stupid imagination lar....However, UUM really let me learn lor...learn how to survive with small amount of water when there is a water crisis....small amount of water to brush teeth and wash face....how to stay cool and not sweat so much during water crisis period...what to eat during that period and a lot other stuff....Honestly, i would never have learnt that if i'm at home, cos there is always enough water to bath, to survive like normal...even if there is water shortage, still have water in the tank....and then not long after that, the water supplies will come lor...always have food to eat, cos mum is always there preparing for us....no worries because mum have always done the planning...

Suddenly realised that actually i'm so not independent....so childish...so no planning...and will be worry and panic because dunno what to do whenever there is a problem...I have always be depending to my mum for everything and all sort of decision making...No wonder, she is so worried each time i want to go somewhere far and hard to reach by her....

But, now i think i'm more independent even though there are still times when i'm stil can't make decision and need to depend on people....But life in UUM make me dependless, there is no one i can depend on....from the first day of sem1 class....i have been arrange to go through alone....no coursemate that is similar timetable with me...I need to find my own group of fren...end up, all different types of people...different college, different course, different character....none is the closest and long lasting frenship....is just like they are there for me to go through daily life...or activities...when the activities ends, frenship oso ends....and when i need a true fren, no one is there for me....felt myself is a failure, a failure in interpersonal skills, a failure in relationship with human....itz all my fault?....itz the problem is because of me?

Weekends....

This weekends really gone through with a lot of activities...making myself felt busy and fun...

Wednesday went to Sports Complex with ML and XW...play badminton and do gym...is been a long time since i last played badminton....After playing, my whole body muscle felt pain, from shoulder, neck, legs and even back feel pain...and sweat a lot...but i loves the feeling...the feeling of sweating and the feeling of tired and can direct have a good night sleep after the game...so fun and relaxing...Will go again next Wednesday...so looking forward to it...

Then, Thursday and Friday,...have to wakeup real early...630am...because i need to attend the Agent Custom Course at 800am....spent the whole two days in Convention Centre and my faculty...listening to lectures from Mr.Lim...one of the custom agent from Putrajaya...the course seems so relaxing...because most of the time, i just feel like i just ate..then is time to eat again...and few hours later eat again...then is time to go back....wonder when exam is coming, how ah?....But, i have paid rm270 for this course, so surely can't skip class and can't fail it la...

Then, today, Saturday....i'm here again and later have to do a powerpoint for Strategic Management presentation on Tuesday....Monday will be presenting AFTA for my Seminar class...and tomorrow Sunday will present for Cross Cultural....three more asignments to go...Insurance passup on 2 April (not even started on it yet), Seminar on 4 april ( about MAS, but its info is so hard to get) and MNC ( abt Genting and Taiwan, gosh...it looks hard)...

The final exam timetable is out...and is confirmed ady...i get what i wishes for...i'm the earliest to go back in my room...will be finishing exam on 7 May...but the timetbl is very hectic....
25April ( HRM), 28April (Strategic), 30April ( Cross Cultural Mgmt), 3May (MNC & Insurance Cargo), 5May ( Seminar) and 7May (Infomartion System)....Meaning i need to prepare early for my final and dun have any extra time for me to go back home....Thinking of that i have so many stuff to bring, can i be able to bring all back when 7may??...Wish i can go back once before final started..but with Custom course on Thurs and Fri....and classes still going on....i need to skip class if i really want to go back....

Now in my mind is can't wait to finish my studies in UUM....can't wait to grad and go outside...planned with CN and Evon....maybe will get to go Singapore with them after their practicum...tats around August....or middle of August....will be looking forward to new life and new environment....

Plan to change my phone number and not to keep in touch with some of the people in uni...cos i have learned a lot from here....not only academic but also from the people here....most of the time, is so hard to differentiate people and to judge people....All this while, i manage my life by believing my instinct,...but now, i realised that my instinct sometimes takes me to the wrong path....People i once thought i can be best friend with....changed...and they are not my best friends anymore....people i thought i can trusted in...share a lot of secrets and stories tgthr....can't be trusted anymore and i even risk the fact that i may be betrayed someday....
Roomates that i thought can be close with and tried to be close with....now i realised is not tat simple...efforts from one side is useless....and i'm tired too...

I dun want to spend my time trying to get good connection with other people anymore or tried to make good friends anymore....bcos there is no security in that...people change...they really do...better invest my time in money and other investment....cos although is risky, at least i get to control it and have the power to make decision...to sell or to buy....but humanbeings?....sometimes u only will get hurt and never get the return....and it can't be measured from whether how much u have invested in....is measureless....so is the damage....is measureless....

Frens from sem1 until now....so close once..but now seems so far away....itz when uni ends, evrythgs oso ends??....include frenship?....i'm disappointed....really am.....

Why am I such a STUPID???!!!

Today only i get to know a truth...
A truth that make me laugh....
Laugh at myself for being such a stupid...
Laugh at myself for being used by people...

Today only i know that all these while,...i was just being played...being used by a person to attract some other people's attention....
I thought what you told me was true and you really meant it...
But now, only i realise that u just used me and never even meant anythg u said before...

But, that's not the big problem...i have started to put down evrything and act normal back...and started to forget whatever that have happen....
But, what i was angry and funny at is that...all this while, i was so stupid that i dun really know the true story of what was happening behind....i dun know that every action that i did and meant nothing...is being interpreted by other people that there is a reason...
And the reason that they said it was....is actually something that i dunno myself...
How come such funny things can happen to me?
I did something that i din intend to and din meant anythg...but for other people what i did is actually the explanation for another story...a story that i dunno its existence until today??

Recently i did an assignment on nonverbal communication for my Cross Cultural Management....about misunderstanding that happen between people in different culture and countries...where some nonverbal cues that meant well in a culture are interpreted as bad or rude in another culture....
But, today i realised that not only in different culture...same culture oso can happen misunderstanding...

L tell Y that he likes her...Y believe him....but turn out that L only using Y to make SA jealous or attract SA attention....Y was unaware of that at all...Y doesn't know anythg between L and SA...Y doesn't know the story of L and SA....Y and SA know each other but were not close enough to always be together or chat closely....Y and SA only hi-bye fren....Y treat SA just like normal fren...no misunderstanding, no hating, no particular any other reason...just normal like everyone else...But, one day, someone tell Y that everyone was saying that Y is avoiding SA...Y treated SA like a rival...That, Y ignored SA everytime they meet....That, Y was pretending to be good with SA when in front of SA....But, every single action of Y towards SA doesn't meant anything at all...Y din know anything about that...
It was even funny to Y when she gets to know that people is giving an explanation for all her action...for the reason why Y treat SA tat way....the reason because they were fighting over L....Haha!!!Hahaha!!!....So funny, how come Y doesn't know herself that what her action meant...because from beginning till now, Y never did anything special towards SA....They were thinking too much....Y doesn't even know what was going on??....Suddenly, Y felt that she was being played, being used....And hate L so much....How could L used Y?...How could L choose Y to be used?...Did Y did anythibg bad towards L that L need to treat Y like tat?....Making Y's reputation gone?....Making Y being misunderstand by everyone?...Making Y like a stupid that dun even know what was happening until today?....How could L be so cruel?...Didn't Y told L from the beginning that she is weak...and naive...dun ever played with her???

Be strong ys!!!Take it as an experience...as a lesson....dun easily trust people anymore!!!!

Finally....just left one more assignment to go before starting another two...phew....for the whole week, been rushing assignment to be passup...all in a row....Strategic Management passing up on 18mac...International Business Management Seminar passup on 19mac and Cross Cultural Management passup on 20mac....

The Strategic asgnmt is to do a review on Astro...its company and the strategies involved....but i think i did that badly...our group did it badly...no discussion..no cooperation..just distribute task between us..and tats it...until final combination....which is sucks!!! Because i feel that a group can only do its task perfectly when there is a bonding among them...With this bonding only will have synergy....Our group no synergy at all. And when i'm stuck with my work, i dun even know how to ask them and discuss, because each part is related to each other...So, i oso dun put my heart in tis asgmt...just let it be and dun care a bout it anymore..

The best group i have during tis sem is my Seminar grp...Perfect!Bravo!I love u guys...Brief discussion but come out with great job...Two guys and two gals...The guys i only knew them during tis sem but perfect cos they put their heart in their job...So, i love tis group the best...cos i no need to rush last minutes and no much headache...just perfect when evryone does her/his part...

While the Cross Cultural group....haih....is the lecturer arrange de...two Malay gals and two Chinese gal and me...The group is lack of creativity which is very important for this subject...I'm not a creative person yet my group member is more uncreative than me...Nevermind....still can handle...But, when the lecturer ask for certain aspect for our asgmt..they can't do it...and when i give explanation and ask them to do for second time...the same result is given to me...
Then, i feel that is worthless if i tell them for the third time and will probably get the same result again...So, i better do it myself...
But, the frustrating part is when i need to do the whole thing and then rushing at the same time for other asgmt..Sometimes, really feel that why some ppl can be so parasit and we have to be kind enough to let them be the parasit??

But nevermind....take it as a small obstacles la....gambateh ys!!...after tis will have three more asgmt to go....Multinational Corporation on Genting to be submit on 9 april, Insurance Cargo to be submit on 2 april and another Seminar asgmt on GLC companies......

Feeling were getting better these few days....Started to ignoring people who i need to forget and ignor....Busyness really will make me better and back to old days....Custom course will started this weekend...more busy ....then will go to FIS Dinner tis 26mac..my faculty dinner....gonna make myself feel pretty and feel confidence...

How come the best medicine for a gal is to be pretty and feel pretty? I always in good mood when i get to dress pretty and feel confident with myself....Does every gals feel the same too??

Valentine Days for the Whole Year.....

一年里的12个情人节

1月14日 Diary Day 日记情人节
新的一年的开始，对自己喜欢的人要有表白和计划，写在自己的日记本里，在心中撒下爱的种子。
2月14日Valentine’s Day 传统情人节
根据西方的传统，喜欢他就快送他巧克力，要赶快哦，因为他不一定只收到你的那块巧克力~~
3月14日 White Day 白色情人节
送于等到这一天了！他也喜欢你吗？还是他知识喜欢吃巧克力？今天就会知道了！在送出巧克力的一个月后，女生就能收到同样喜欢自己的男生送的白色糖果。吃颗糖，感觉真甜蜜！
4月14日 Black Day 黑色情人节
这个黑色可不是“黑色星期五”的黑色哦，而是杂酱面是黑色的。他吃了你送的巧克力，你尝了他送的糖，那么一起去吃杂酱面吧！在传统好味道里，两个人的心也可以连在一起。
5月14日 Yellow &Rose Day 玫瑰情人节
在一起也有一段时间了，他是真的喜欢你吗？他真的是你要找寻的那一半吗？应该表白一下啦！不好意思？没关系，你只要在今天买玫瑰给对方就OK啦！白色——一般朋友，黄色——知己，红色——爱人。你一定会送红色的。
6月14日 Kiss Day 亲亲情人节
你也手到他的红玫瑰了？我闪人。因为你们马上要kiss了！今天看见别人在kiss，不用回避，因为今天是Kiss Day。
7月14日 Silver Day 银色情人节
传统习俗是用银戒订婚，所以今天你们也去买一对，戴在手上，作为甜蜜心情的见证。
8月14日 Green Day 绿色情人节
相爱的人们成双成对地去郊游，爬山游水感受自然，就像他们要携手走过爱情一样。
9月14日Music &Photo Day 相片情人节
练了好久的情歌今天终于登场了，虽然五音不全，但是用去听就有会新的笑容！拿出相机，拍下这灿烂、充满甜蜜的笑容。
10月14日 Wine Day 葡萄酒情人节
烛光下晃动着深红的葡萄酒，爱情一样要用心慢慢的品味。
11月14日 Orange & Movie Day 电影情人
节今晚有空吗？一起去看电影吧！手牵手一起去电影院，记得买橙汁~。
12月14日 Hug Day 拥抱情人节
一年了，你们仍然相爱，你看天空飘着雪花，而你们相拥在一起，永远也不知道寒冷……
排骨

发表于 2005-3-25 10:04:00
白 色 情 人 节 的 故 事
“白色情人节”最早起源于三世纪时的罗马。罗马皇帝在2月14日救了一对因为原本因违反恋爱结婚禁令而要被处死的恋人，罗马皇帝为了纪念这一天而设立了情人节。而在一个月后的3月14日，这对获救的恋人宣誓恋情将至死不渝，为纪念这一天，于是另订为白色情人节。
另外，这也是跟日本的民间传说有关的一个情人节。二月十四号原本是女孩子对男孩子诉诸情意的日子，由女孩子送情人礼物给男孩子，但是渐渐发展到最后，已经不分彼此，现在的情人节由谁主动送礼物已经不重要了。在日本，如果一方在二月十四日当天收到异性送的情人礼物表达爱意，而且对对方也有同样的好感或情意时，就会在三月十四日回送对方一份情人礼物，表示今年彼此已经心心相印了。所以他们就把三月十四日这一天，订为“白色情人节”。

Happy White Valentine's Day.....today only i know that there are so many valentine days in the whole year....but as long as a couple is caring for each other....everyday is a Valentine Day la....

wish that all the lovers be blessed.....

To the one I love - devotion

迷っています...

私がとても悲しくて何でそうしたか。
私のお気に入りの歌を聞いてください、私がもはやであることを知っていて私について述べて、私に似合う。
私がそうでそれで何かを愛するためにがっかりさせてください、途方に暮れるまで
私は自分の方へのあらゆる敬意〔点〕をあきらめることさえできます
ちょうどその誰かを愛するために
今,この瞬間,私は私のもののこの歌を聞きます
もはや私のものではありません....
私は今はもう私のものであるために歌を持っていません
私が歌を台無しにしてどれ属していました
誰も私にこの歌のための拍手をくれません
私はこの歌を恥ずべくします
私が恥ずべきで自分の,私がちょうど愛のためにしたもので恥ずべきです。
私が自分か誰と対戦するとはもはや勇敢ではありません
そして　私の将来もである
私が自分のことで遺憾に思うと感じます　自分を愛していないために
私は、むしろ私にこの命を捧げるもののことで遺憾に思うと感じます
全部のほとんどで　もの　誰か　常に　私のそばで私が良いかあるいは悪くあろうとも私を与えることが支持する
私は希望を将来に入れる勇気を持ちません
私は希望を自分に入れる勇気を持ちません
私は裂かれました...
決して修繕のはずがない私の心の中に穴〔ホール〕があります
天使から、私は壊れた天使になりました
壊れた天使から、私は死にかけている天使に頼ります
そして、私は今死んでいます
私の守護天使たちさえ私に失望しています
私の生命の空虚はより深くなります
とうとう、　どのように　それが終わる？
私はそれを想像する勇気を持ちません...
迷っています...

lovely....isn't it?...
the meaning is .....

To the one I love - devotion

In a dream I hold you close,embracing you with my hands
You gazed at me with eyes of love and made me understand that i was meant to share it with you
My heart, my soul, my mind-It's all you need!
Then,I open my eyes and all i see reality shows i'm alone
How much i wish someday tht you'll be my side
But i know one day it'll come coz I know God's just waiting for the time is right.

Please don't play with my heart, don't play with my mind
The care that I pour unto you is truthfully deep from my heart
The every words you say,everything you do might means nothing to others
but it means a lot to me...
Even a small mistake will make my heart bleeds a thousand days
I cant get anymore challenge, I m in the edge

God,will you please keep him safe from thunderstorm
When the day's cold,please keep him warm,
When the darkness falls will you please shine him away?
God,will you let him know I love him so
When there's no one there that he's not alone
Just close his eyes and let him know
My heart is beating with him

So I prayed until that day
with our hearts will beat as one
I will wait so patiently for the day to come
It's worth to live my life,to spend my life waiting for you

Horoscope for March 7, 2007

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sep 22)

The Bottom Line
Don't sell yourself short -- you have a formidable intellect and a curious mind.

In Detail
Someone who you thought would introduce you to a whole new way of thinking might turn out to be something of an intellectual dud -- this person has a lot of style but not much substance, so don't invest too much time in this relationship right now. As it turns out, you're the more intellectually curious one. This may be an example of you selling yourself short. You are no lightweight, and you don't need another person to lead your mental exploration.

today's horoscope about me...i feel is quite true...lately dun have heart in doing things again...tomorrow actualy have a midsem exam...human resources management...not finish study yet..actually is hardly started yet...but just dun feel like studying....my heart gone for vacation liao...even i oso dunno where to find her back....
i thought i will be normal back when i get myself superb busy again...so i dun have time to think nonsense...enroll myself for a custom agent course....taking up all my weekends de time...leaving only a Saturday is free for me to do asignments...7 subject de asignment...wondering : waoh!...ys!...can u handle ?...u think urself is a robot or a super woman??....
but i guess everything is depend on urself...if u want to get things done...u will....
i'll take the horoscope advice....not letting other people to manipulate my mind anymore....dun waste my time on nonsense people....be charge of myself again....
i can go on...and live a better life...
u feel u will be very good after coming and disturb my life and my mind?...
leaving me feeling lost and not like previous...
i will show u that....
although i'm weak...i'm easily hurt...i'm easily lie by u...
but i stil keep my self esteem...
i stil have my ego...
i stil afraid to lose...
i stil will find my way to be a winner in my own life...
u will regret of what u have done....

Gambateh YS!!!
u can de!!!

歌曲：梦里花
歌手：张韶涵

唯一纯白的梦里花
盛开在琥珀色月牙
就算失去所有爱的力量
我也不曾害怕

天空透露着微光
照亮虚无迷惘
在残垣废墟之中
寻找唯一梦想
古老的巨石想象
守护神秘光芒
清澈的蓝色河流
指引真实方向
穿越过风沙
划破了手掌
坚定着希望去闯
唯一纯白的梦褃花
盛开在琥珀色月牙
就算失去所有爱的力量
我也不曾害怕

古老的巨石想象
守护神秘光芒
清澈的蓝色河流
指引真实方向
穿越过风沙
划破了手掌
坚定着希望去闯
唯一纯白的梦里花
盛开在琥珀色月牙
就算失去所有爱的力量
我也不曾害怕
穿越千年的石板画
刻画着永恒的天堂
轻轻拭去漫布全身的伤
我从不曾绝望....

When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms

To my married and unmarried friends:

This is a very touching story, please read it slowly, I've read it more than twice....

When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms

On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy.. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.

This was the scene ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.

Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.Dew came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls. Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife..

But I couldn't help doing so.I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture, O.K.? I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body.

This was the means of my entertainment. One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious. When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.

Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry.. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart.

The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer. Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table.

I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again. She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.

She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning. I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.

On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this.

I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now.

She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain..

Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head. Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly.

I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old.I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy. I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door.

I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.She looked at me, astonished.

Then she touched my forehead. You got no fever.. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce.

My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you. Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears.

I walked downstairs and drove to the office.When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.